As a mother of 3 young children I often hear of moms who have no free time or no clue how to even start making friends with other moms… it’s almost like dating all over again. While motherhood is busy it is no excuse to not have friends. God created us to be in fellowship with him and with others. In Genesis, after God created man he states that it is not good for man to be alone, he therefore creates woman. Today as well, it is not good for us to be alone, God created us to be with others.
I know some of you are saying, I’m an introvert, I don’t need friends. I am sorry, you may be an introvert, but you do need friends, maybe not as many as those crazy extrovert people… As a mom, especially a mother of a preschooler, it is easy to forget how to have an adult conversation, or that there are books without pictures, or real food that people actually eat. Other moms understand what you are going through and can meet you where you are. As your friendship develops they can be a support and encouragement to you and maybe even give you some helpful advice or inspire you. You may also be able to give that mom the encouragement she has been needing. Often times as a mom it is easy to feel lonely and isolated.
How to find friends:
In today’s world with smart phones finding new friends is as easy as asking to swap contact information. If you run into a mom at a park or other venue don’t be afraid to start up a conversation, if you hit it off, swap info and plan a play date, maybe even at the same location.
Another way to find friends is at your church. Get involved in a life group. Many churches have life groups for women or young families. These can help you get more involved in God’s word and help you meet some people.
You can also try joining a group. MOPS (Mother’s of Preschoolers) is a wonderful group for meeting MOPS moms. MOPS is an international organization and most groups are ran very similarly. MOPS is focused on building community and encouraging relationships to help moms realize their potential as a mother, woman, wife, and creation of God. Some other great groups to check out are Mom to Mom, CBS, and BSF. These other groups are more bible study focused and not limited to just mothers of preschoolers, these aspects offer other benefits.
Library story time is also a great place to meet moms with children of similar ages. Many libraries offer toys or play areas to use after story time. Again, don’t be afraid to strike up a conversation with another mom, maybe even let your toddler lead you to the friend he/she is interested in.
Finding time for Friends:
My children and I both need “friend time”. In our weekly schedule I plan at least 1 morning for a Play Date. If we start coming up to that week and I don’t have anything planned I start contacting moms. If there is a local event going on (like story time), sometimes I will invite a friend to go along. If you find that you are having a hard time finding one on one time with friends you may also consider scheduling in a monthly night out. Maybe try going to dinner with a friend or sharing in a common interest. I find that I bond most with friends when we do things together. I really enjoy running (well I usually enjoy it), I have a couple friends that do as well. We try to meet once a week to run together, through this shared time our friendship has blossomed.